dance glutton new year

I am a dance glutton. I danced 4 hours on New Year’s Day. Two hours of ecstatic dance in the morning and 2 hours of contact improve in the afternoon. My body is deliciously sore today. My flesh feels deeply happy and satisfied. This year I will dance and I will move and I will continue to fall in love with life. This year I will glory in this middle aged body with all its lovely flaws. I will embrace my non perfection with excitement and build on all that I have.

Sometimes I think that I am split. I go off to these lovely playgrounds where we turn into our real selves. The dance floor allows us to morph into our deepest selves. The dance floor allows us to try on parts of our personality that we are not comfortable with in the outside world. I walk onto the dance floor and I drop all my inhibitions behind. I drop all the voices that say don’t and I am willing to walk up to the people I want to dance with and give myself 100% to them and the dance. Nothing is withheld. I look for those dancers who are in the same place. I look for the men who are willing to come in drag. I look for the men who are willing to throw away all notions of what it is to be a man. I look for the women who do the same. I dance from the deepest of my spirit. I dance with God manifest in each person in the room. I dance with God at play. God working out all of God’s foibles on the dance floor. I look for dancers who are willing to come from that place of abandoning themselves to the God within. I look for dancers who acknowledge their connection to the creative spirit in themselves.

I dream of dancing. I awake in the night with the touch of flesh in my dreams. I awake and I bring myself back to this moment and this warm bed and the beautiful flesh of my lover beside me. I awake and I am grateful that I was given this incarnation in the flesh to enjoy all my humanness. I awaken and I give myself to God again and again, in gratitude and with a request to align myself with God’s will that I might live rightly. I awaken and I know that the dance is a path for me to align with God.